Español es Una Montaña Rusa Para Mi

The tools of the trade.

As diplomats we are given the chance to learn languages as rare and unknown as Quechua and as common as French.  This opportunity is at once a rare luxury and a humbling mind warp.  More than two years ago, when I finished studying Arabic and headed off for the Persian Gulf to serve in Bahrain, I thought that most likely I would head to another Arabic or English-designated posting for my second tour, but I fortunate enough to receive Spanish training for my consular assignment to Honduras.

Unlike Arabic, I immediately found Spanish appealing.  Arabic was a struggle the whole way through, with deep periods of disappointment, as it seemed I would never be able to communicate with any degree of comfort.  It’s true that today, if someone asked me if I speak Arabic, I would be dishonest to reply with anything more than “A very little bit, nothing more.”  Spanish, on the other hand, I soon discovered, was all around me in Washington.  If I wanted to I could completely immerse myself in the language without feeling distant from where I live here and now.  I was very excited about all the Spanish I would be speaking and the people I would be speaking Spanish with in the District.  That feeling faded about a month in, when I realized it was not going to be all pupusas and cerveza on the way to learning the mother tongue of Miquel de Cervantes, nor was I going to be speed-reading Don Quixote anytime soon.

TLA’s Best of Bahrain

My colleague and former office mate runs a blog called Two Crabs.  It’s a professional operation he’s got going on over there.  Book recommendations, a travelogue, thoughts on work life, the blog is a real powerhouse among Foreign Service blogs.  Just before his departure from Bahrain, he posted an exhaustive list of just what the title of this suggests post suggests: the best of what’s out there to do in Bahrain.  There is no way to top that, but as I reread his post I realized we differed on as many of our opinions about this little island as we agreed upon.  This is not the first time my colleague and fellow blogger has been featured on this blog.  Perhaps you remember Peace Out Man, where I semi-roasted my brother-in-bureaucracy.  Here’s my take (with minor variations to the original work) on his epic project:

Presenting the first (and not necessarily last) TLA Best of Bahrain Awards!  TLA is off to new horizons, to lands unknown, but not without first imparting a little of my less than expert institutional knowledge gained spending over 22 months on this rock on the Western edges Persian Gulf.

RECREATION

Best Friday Brunch: Meh…  If I’m really honest about it, I didn’t much care for Friday brunches.  It was overpriced, over-boozed, and overrated.  You end up spending half the day eating and drinking, and then you end up unable to do anything with the rest of your day and to kick you’re able to enjoy a headache that lasts well into the next morning.  I can think of better ways to spend my Fridays.

Best Beach: Al Dar Island is an under appreciated spot with great views (albeit mostly of oil refineries) and good times.  It’s nice to grab a beer and food and lounge on a beach cabana.  We wanted to rent one of the overnight cabins with some friends but never got around to it.  Honorable Mention: There is a little public beach down on the south western coast called Al Jaza’ir that was a lot better than friends described, and my wife and I sat on a piece of cardboard (it’s more ground up seashells than sand) and ate cheese, salami, and crackers one afternoon.

Al Dar Island

Best Tourist Attraction: Qa’lat Al-Bahrain (Bahrain Fort) is by far the most spectacular historical monument in Bahrain.  It is a UNESCO World Heritage Site and home to five forts on the seafront and ruins of civilizations that date to times B.C.  However, the most striking remnant of the past is the Portuguese-constructed fort whose minaret-shaped turret is hard to forget.  It is also a great place to people watch, as Bahrainis of all stripes converge there each evening (especially in the fall and spring) to enjoy the walking paths, ride their horses, and dip their feet in the waters of Persian Gulf.  Honorable Mention: Another newly-christened UNESCO WHS, the Pearling Pathway, traces its path through the northern island of Muharraq.  It is difficult to find and hard to follow, but for the adventurous traveler, it is worth the time and energy.

Qa’lat Al-Bahrain

Most underrated tourist attraction: The Manama Suq is a fun spot to frequent if you live in Bahrain, but if you wind through the suq, passing all the gold and trinket shops, as well as the tailor shops and remittance brokers, you will finally reach the intersection where a number of the most important Shi’a religious centers face each other in a perpetual stand off, unwilling to give any more sacred ground to the others.  It is the site of the most fervent of the bloody Ashura processions each year, and the crossroads of an uprising.  Make sure a protest is not planned for your visit.

2012 in Review: A Short History of TLA

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2012 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

600 people reached the top of Mt. Everest in 2012. This blog got about 3,300 views in 2012. If every person who reached the top of Mt. Everest viewed this blog, it would have taken 6 years to get that many views.

Click here to see the complete report.

Vietnam: The Interview

Hanoi

When my colleague asked me to draft up something for Vietnam for the embassy newsletter, I was excited about the prospect.  The trip had been worth documenting, and I had a dozen ideas of different things I might write about.  But as I am nearing the end of my tour, I found little time to spare to dedicate to the project.  Then I was struck by an idea that was fresh and interesting, and probably better than anything I would have written myself.  I could interview my wife, who accompanied me on the trip to the land of Ho, and get her perspective.  It had been around two months since our trip and I realized it was probably the perfect time to capture her thoughts on Vietnam, while they are still fresh, but she has had time to process them and decide which ones will be part of her long term memories.  Ever the diplomat, she agreed and so, without further ado here is the totally impromptu interview:

(Begin our only very slightly edited [to protect the innocent] interview.  Thank you my dearest wife.)

Q: Is there anything I can get for you?

A: Yes, you can move those [decorative vases I put in dumb location where our cat could knock them over].

Q: OK, can we do that after the interview?

A: Yes.

Q: Thank you for taking the time to talk with me today.  I know you have a busy schedule.

A: I do.

Q: I really appreciate the opportunity to talk to you about your trip to Vietnam.

A: …(silence)…

Q: OK, nothing to say about that then?

A: (laughter) I’m very happy to talk about my trip to Vietnam.  It’s one the best trips I have ever taken.

Q: Great.  Save all the Vietnam stuff for the interview.  So, Vietnam: how long were you in Vietnam?  What were the cities you visited?

A: We were in Vietnam about nine days and stayed initially in Hanoi.  Then we took a boat trip out to Ha Long Bay before returning to Hanoi for the final days.

Reflections on a First Tour

I’m nearly done here.  It’s time to move on.  My replacement has arrived and she is learning to take over my responsibilities.  This is the nature of this business; you move to a place, finally settle down and begin to understand what motivates the people that live there, and then it is time to say goodbye.  As the days begin to pass more quickly and my colleagues begin positioning themselves to manage our office’s responsibilities without me, I find myself clinging to relevance.  A relevance that is likely imagined, but seemed real every once in a while.  I realize now that I am in no hurry to relinquish my life as a Political Officer in Bahrain, but I know that is exactly what is happening, whether I like it or not.

Bahrain Fort @ magic hour

There’s Something Different About This House

With a view like this how could anyone complain?

It has been quite a while since I last posted and intended on doing so the past two weekends, but time and energy have been in short supply as of late.  But another problem has plagued me as well: what should I write about that I (and others) might find interesting beyond 2012 (assuming we make it past the Mayan calendar end date).  This blog’s purpose is in part to entertain (when possible) and in part to inform and finally yesterday, I finally decided on something that might be interesting years from now: how my living quarters in Bahrain differs from what we have come appreciate (or take for granted) back home in the States.

On the surface my apartment is not dramatically different than an apartment one would find in any large city across the U.S.  It sits comfortably on the fourth floor of my seven story building and has a nice balcony.  There are doors with locks that make sense, a kitchen, bedrooms, bathrooms, and a dining room.  The furniture provided by the embassy is all pretty standard, and despite being a bit outdated (design name = modern colonial), it is perfectly acceptable.  But, that is about where the similarities stop and the differences begin.

Oh Man, Oman

A building that befits Jasmine.

When I was younger I thought Arabia must be a land that resembled something of a cross between Aladdin (the Disney adaptation) and the epic scenery of Peter O’Toole’s Lawrence of Arabia. Yet, upon my arrival in Bahrain, I found it to be radically different from that vision. In fact, most of the places I have visited in Persian Gulf have been significantly less fantastical and although some retain elements that are traditional, much of what I found was sterile and modern. Places like Doha and Dubai evoke a sense of modern decadence and delusion, with their tall glass phallic symbols and dusty surroundings devoid of color and yet full of asphalt and artificial light. In the sole Arab country I have visited outside of the Gulf, Jordan, the countryside and squat buildings reminded me of a poor European country, and even the remarkable historical landmarks like Petra and the wondrous natural beauty of the Dead Sea transported me to a very un-Arab world (I did not make it to Wadi Rum, made famous by Lawrence). Oman, was the first place where the imaginations of my childhood were realized.

Getting Juiced About Honduras

This post is long in the making.  As I sit here drinking my breakfast of apple, pear, celery, and ginger juice I want to make two quick statements: we are going to Honduras for our next post, and I’m grateful to my friend for getting me the most awesome wedding gift, a juicer!  The Breville Juicer (no this isn’t an advertisement) is awesome!  Thank you to an unnamed friend in Seattle who hooked me up.  It will be making the journey with us to our next posting in Honduras.

Martha Stewart’s classic herb drink.

Wives Who Watch Star Wars are Better

Source: fanpop.com

Now that the Olympics are over, it is time to refocus my attention for entertainment elsewhere.  Being abroad in the foreign service gives you ample time to forget most of the popular culture references you learned in the U.S., meanwhile providing the opportunity to never learn the latest that come to pass. However, I couldn’t let that happen, it’s just not my style. Unfortunately, I have learned, mostly from newly arriving colleagues, that it was becoming my style. I could do as some of my colleagues (including military guys) do and read Us, People, and Entertainment Weekly to keep up, but again, that’s just not my style. I’ve turned to relearning what I have forgotten and becoming a fan of new TV shows, movies, and music to try and keep myself somewhat in the know.

Olympic Obsession

(source: artdesigncafe.com)

I love the Olympics! My TV has displayed the games everyday since they began with arguably the most eccentric and amazing opening ceremony imaginable from the mind that brought us Trainspotting. They play in the background until some sport grabs me and I watch intently for the next few hours getting caught up in the commentary, wondering how I have not always been an avid fan of sailing or taekwondo. I caught every second of Usain Bolt’s 100 meter qualifying and victory, and most of the 200. The women’s heptathlon and men’s decathlon became two of my new favorite events, which begs the question: why we don’t bring back the Ancient Olympic pentathlon with the triagmos of long jump, javelin throw, and discus, along with a stadion foot race, and grand finale of a wrestling to decide the final victor?!?  LeBron James dunked on a seven foot Chinese guy and we dunked on the Chinese in the medal count, finally after trailing them for most of the Olympics. And who can deny that Michael Phelps has enough gold to be a Bond villain.